What's your pain?

I picked up the phone today to connect or network with a fabulous lady and successful business owner of www.bodyexchange.ca she said something Epic to me at least and I feel it’s worthy of sharing.

We were talking about health and fitness and what it is that is blocking our clients and sometimes ourselves from achieving our desired fitness levels. What is causing the self destructive behaviours that block us from greatness such as: over-eating, over-drinking, over-anything that works in numbing us out.

Pain! What's your pain? Not the one in your knee or your back or your backside; but the one in your heart? That pain untouched, not healed or not shared will continue to cause the unhealthy self-sabotage that many of us are afflicted with.

My pain is still loss and grief. In the last decade I've lost my mom at 63 after two leg amputations, my dad 6 months later to heart attack at the age of 66 and my mother-in-law who passed three weeks later from cancer. They all missed the birth of our first son by 6 months. Just when I got a little bit of balance and what I thought a grip on parenting I was diagnosed with postpartum depression. I was treated for depression but I believe it was unresolved or repressed grief.

After that next dark valley came the most unexpected and sudden loss when my baby sister dropped dead at 42 years old from a massive brain aneurysm. My bottom fell out. I have never experienced such earth shattering pain. I really thought I had experienced walking through loss until this loss. I had done multiple grief groups and counseling all good work but the loss of Catherine had me completely derailed for a good six months.

All I knew is I had to fake it for my kids and I had to keep on the path of health and wellness. I continued to teach (all the while faking joy) and yet was inspired by others wanting to change their lives and my sister was all over that. So I continue and will continue to trudge along this journey and while I've come out that dark tunnel and see sunshine again, when I experience those valleys of emotions or if I'm up late eating junk I try to pause as those are my signals to share with others my pain. Even if my head and heart aren’t connecting what's going on my negative behaviours are my signals that something is going on and usually if I talk it comes out.

A burden shared is a burden halved. I keep teaching, moving, sharing, motivating and educating so I (we) can share abundant health. So go move and be grateful for your body regardless of the shape. Remember wellness starts in our heart, then our mind, and then by moving and healthy eating. I wish you abundance.

I'm perfectly Imperfect I'm a Progressional Athlete

It's tough some days being a self-employed personal trainer. You see it’s a lonely business when I’m away from my clients and left to my own mind. When alone my mind defaults to the negative loop tapes and I do believe three tapes play at once in my mind. They tell me I should have rock hard abs, I should not have had that berry crumble last night, horrors if I'm online or reading a fitness magazine that I see those images and feel a sense of failure as I don't look like those super athletes or the super models who by the way have great pressure and magical tricks to capture those professional images of perfection. Usually after my workouts the tapes stop and I remember I'm just perfect the way I am.....perfectly imperfect.

For each person being ‘in shape’, the shape you desire is a very personal thing. Just the word ‘shape’ leads one to believe that this quest is an actual body shape and of course our society screams ‘skinny” is the shape. Don’t get me wrong it would be greet to be firm all over and have the muscle tone and definition I absolutely desire but people its progress not perfection. I am a Progressional Athlete. Professionals or elite athletes do NOT achieve what they do without sacrifice; be it relationships, never having treats or time with their kids (if they have any) and the list could go on. Define your own success. If I can fit a workout in everyday, be a good mom, wife, train my clients and keep a home somewhat clean - I am laughing and I am generally happy.

In regards to shape I learned awhile back to ‘never judge a book by its cover’ and fit isn’t about size. I have been blessed to work with some extremely strong and fit trainers and clients at the Body Exchange Health and Fitness. These plus-size clients are strong and fit and are achieving their goals long-term one day at a time, one workout at a time. They know results take time and loads of effort.

As a working mom balance is my constant challenge. For me to be the best person I can for my family and for you as a trainer I need to eat well and sweat hard daily. I cannot afford to call a walk my workout today - maybe later in my life. Today to shed unwanted calories and achieve the endorphin release I need to keep me sane I must raise my heart rate to my acceptable training zone. Google that folks. Depending again on the time I have that day sometimes it means splitting my desired 60 min into 2-30 minute workouts or 3-20 minute time frames. Be creative, today my workout was in the basement on my spin bike while I did laundry, spinning while watching the spin cycle. We can't all be carrying our yoga mats into a studio while wearing our lulu pants and then going for skinny lattes (but I can dream).

Look around your home got a room you can groove in? Spin, do a fitness DVD, join a class, walk, run, or dance. What's holding you back? No money get a workout off the internet or at the library, got money hire a trainer or join a group fitness class or bootcamp. People, it is progress not perfection.

If I can fit a workout in everyday, be a good mom and wife, eat healthy, train my clients and keep a home I am a success – if I don’t succeed at all the above I am still a success. Move more and eat less! Blessings to you and yours!